The first three letters of "blog" are B. Lo

totallybeelow @ 2005-04-19T22:32:00

2005-04-20T03:35:58Z

I think my live journal days are over. If you honestly care about me, you can talk to me in person or give me a phone call. You don't need to read about me online.

And if you honestly care about me, you'd know better than to spread rumors and tell others what I write here. I'm not gonna put up with this anymore.

totallybeelow @ 2005-04-18T18:53:00

2005-04-19T00:11:05Z

So I didn't get into Minnesota. That was a big bummer. I had my heart set. So now I'm waiting to see what Western says. They say that from an academic standpoint, they would love to have me in the program. But as for assistantships, that's still up in the air. So we'll see. Hopefully I'll hear soon.

This past week Wind Ensemble went on tour and it was fun to get away for four days. I spent way too much money, though. And I'm really far behind in classes...Well, not REALLY far behind, but enough for me to be stressed out, like normal. So what do I do? I update my journal instead of working on this paper that I should be working on. I'm such a procrastinator and I hate it. But I'm so not motivated. I'm suffering from senioritis like no other. And the fact that I didn't get into Minnesota and the fact that Western isn't contacting me about my future in their department aren't helping to motivate me. Those facts are actually quite de-motivating me. I feel like what's the point? I have a feeling that next semester, I'll be at home in the QC working because I haven't made it into any grad schools. And while that MAY be okay, I'd much rather get grad school out of the way now. It'll be so hard to go back to school after taking a year off. So we'll see how that goes.

(edited due to rumors)

I just feel like everything has no purpose. I'm not driven by anything. I have no goals to attain because I've tried and been turned down. (This applies to many different aspects of my life.)

I'm listening to this new band that Jonny V. told me about it. I like them. Pocket Change. Let me know if you're interested. K, bye.

totallybeelow @ 2005-04-04T21:35:00

2005-04-05T03:29:33Z

I've been told I need to update this. And I agree. SO much has happened since last I updated. So I'm gonna cover the highlights:

I had a good time at OPE. I had a lot of interviews and some schools seemed to really like me. It's weird how after just a 30-minute interview, I can tell where I would fit and where I wouldn't; where I would enjoy working and where I wouldn't. So that's great. Met some cool people. Went to Western's CSP Days, which is one full day of interviews with Western people for their grad program and assistantships. It was fun. Met some cool people there. Went on Spring Break. Did basically nothing except move from the house to the new apartment. I like it there. I miss the house sometimes, but the apartment is cool too. Came back from Spring Break, went to Minnesota State University in Mankato, MN for on-campus interviews. Yet another whole day of interviews. It was fun, though. And while I was there, I got a fiance and a new Best Friend Forever. So that's awesome.

About a month ago, my mom told me that she was gonna get married. She and her new fiance had been engaged for about 3 weeks before she and my dad were actually divorced. And they had carried this relationship on for the past 1.5 years or so. My sister and I were suspicious of her and this new guy the whole time, but she always tried to tell us that we were wrong. She tried to cover it all up, but we're not dumb. So the night she told me about her new wedding (still a week before the divorce was final) she also asked me to walk her down the aisle with my brother. I agreed to do it, not because I like the situation or the guy (I've never even met the guy! Why meet the guy that I knew my mom was having an affair with?), but I agreed because I knew that it was what she wanted and that it would make her happy. She also asked my sister to be her maid of honor. My sister was NOT happy about the situation at all. She and my mom argued A LOT and my mom ended up in tears much of the time. My sister and I have been thrown a lot of things all at once. The divorce (which was on the grounds that my dad had had numerous affairs way back in the day when my sister was a baby--18 years ago--and we had no idea about it) and the new wedding. That's a lot to process. And we're expected to be okay with it all!! Well, my sister wasn't and about a week ago she called my mom and told her that she wanted nothing to do with the wedding and she didn't want to talk to my mom for quite a while. And I hear about it from both my mom and my sister--they both come to me to talk things through and I have balance all that, along with how I feel about the situation, which is basically just like my sister. Except I'm more supportive of my mom (not the relationship) than my sister is. Ugh. But it turns out that I can't even go to the wedding anyway 'cause I'll be on tour with Wind Ensemble. And my mom was upset when I told her of course, but there's nothing I can do. I kind of feel bad about it, but at the same time, why did the wedding have to be SO SOON?

(edited due to rumors)

totallybeelow @ 2005-02-11T14:34:00

2005-02-11T21:06:53Z

Tuesday I had some mock interviews. Interviews for grad school assistantships. I was definitely not as prepared as I could have been and I feel like some of the people who interviewed me (although they weren't REAL interviews) were thinking that I'm dumb. It's hard to answer questions about something that I haven't had experience with yet. Ya know? Oh well. I'll just prepare more before OPE. Then after Concert Band, Matt Davis took me to Wal-Mart and I got the new Brian McKnight CD!! So excited! Thanks, Matt!! You're by far the coolest ever in the galaxy. That's right; I said galaxy.

Wednesday was Bryan Lopez Day and I had to go to RA Council and then a meeting for ISRAA (Illinois State Resident Assistant Association) (I think that's what it stands for). But I could only stay at the meeting for about 15 minutes 'cause then I had to go sing bids for Phi Mu Alpha. Fun times. No, it really was.

The not fun part of Wednesday was when I had a convo with my friend Rick* (* = name changed because he kept my name a secret in his xanga...and because I don't want those of you who may know him to think that he's a jerk. Though my close friends already know who I'm talking about anyway)and basically we're not friends anymore. He can only handle one at a time and right now that spot is filled by his girlfriend...Umm...okay...Also, he moved around as a skid and hasn't fully recovered from it since all of his friends were taken away from him. I mean, I've moved cross-country, too, but I'm still capable of making friends. I understand that people adjust to things differently, but I'm saddened. He's never had a close guy friend so when he and I started getting really close, he started getting uncomfortable. I don't understand how that makes sense, but whatever. He said that he hoped to still see me around every once in a while so he could "shout out." I told him not to pretend to want to shout out. He also apologized a lot, but those words are kinda lost on me. He said that I'm a good guy and deserve to have better friends than him anyway. I disagree. Whatever. I tried.

Thursday...I'm not really thinking of anything important. Umm..Finished up classes for the week ('cause no clas on Friday!! Awesome!!). Then later, Amanda and I went to Wal-Mart. Twice in one week? That's crazy. Then we made my "huggable" shirt and she added "rocks" to her shirt that already said "geology." Get it? haha. Geology rocks.

And it does.

Then we watched "Waiting for Guffman." Oh, how I love that movie. It'd been a while since I'd seen it.

Today is Friday and there are no classes. That is neat.

totallybeelow @ 2005-02-09T00:22:00

2005-02-09T06:24:31Z

01.] Who are you?
[02.] Are we friends?
[03.] When and how did we meet?
[04.] How have I affected you?
[05.] What do you think of me?
[06.] What's the fondest memory you have of me?
[07.] How long do you think we will be friends?
[08.] Do you like me?
[09.] Would you date me?
[10.] Would you kiss me?
[11.] Would you hug me?
[12.] Physically, what stands out?
[13.] Emotionally, what stands out?
[14.] Do you wish I was cooler?
[15.] Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
[16.] Am I lovable?
[17.] How long have you known me?
[18.] Describe me in one word.
[19.] What was your first impression?
[20.] Do you still think that way about me now?
[21.] What do you think my weakness is?
[22.] Do you think I'll get married?
[23.] What makes me happy?
[24.] What makes me sad?
[25.] What reminds you of me?
[26.] If you could give me anything what would it be?
[27.] How well do you know me?
[28.] When's the last time you saw me?
[29.] Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
[30.] Are you going to put this on your LJ and see what I say about you?

totallybeelow @ 2005-02-07T23:53:00

2005-02-08T05:59:44Z

I got up today and showered and stuff. And then went back to sleep. haha. Headed out to class (10 - 5). Umm...And then at 5 I went over to COFAC because the presidents of the different musical organizations had to be at this interview/meeting thing with an applicant for the Music Department Chair position. It was cool. We sat there and listened to Dr. Faust talk about his future goals and we got to ask him some of our own questions.

After that, I went to dinner with Amanda but I was in a bad mood for some reason. I just didn't want to be around people at all. No idea why that happened. I'm still in that mood a little bit...still no explanation, though.

However, all the meetings I went to tonight helped to cheer me up at least a little bit. We had Hall Government at 7:30. Staff at 8:30. And then I went up to Art's room at 10:30, which just happened to be right as staff was getting done, for our Brotherhood meeting, but he didn't have any business for us so we were done.

Then I went down to the computer lab and printed off some copies of my resume for tomorrow's mock OPE interviews. (OPE = Oshkosh Placement Exchange. It's a conference that I'm going to in March where I'll interview with 2982983 potential grad schools in three days. Kinda fun.) These mock interviews will help to prepare me for the real thing, which is March 3-6. So that's exciting. I'm only semi-nervous. And I have to wear a suit. Not looking forward to it. haha.

Anyway. I'm gonna get going. Good night to everyone!!

totallybeelow @ 2005-02-06T23:36:00

2005-02-07T05:37:36Z

You Are a Little Scary

You've got a nice edge to you. Use it.

How scary are you?

totallybeelow @ 2005-02-06T22:17:00

2005-02-07T04:26:54Z

I wanted to be up around 10:30ish today so I get ready to go to the Smoker (the Phi Mu Alpha info session) which was at noon. My stupid ass didn't awaken until 11:30. Whoops. So I ran around like a madman and made it with one minute to spare. haha. So we had the meeting and it was cool. Then we had to do it all over again 'cause two more guys showed up. haha. That's alright, though. They're cool.

Then we had an actual business meeting and it lasted forever because some of our discussions got pretty heated. That's alright, though. Some of the stuff that was said needed to be said.

Then I got back here and changed into normal clothes. Amanda and I ordered a pizza and ate that whilst watching Shrek 2 with her boyfriend, Rob, and Madeline. After that, Rob left and Amanda and I played Sequence. Then she and Madeline and I played Phase 10. George came over in the midst of the Phase 10 playing. And then Amanda kicked our asses at the game, so we stopped playing. We turned the TV to Animal Planet for whatever reason and watched The Puppy Bowl. It was basically just a really big box that looked like a football stadium with a lot of puppies playing inside of it. It was surprisingly entertaining and addictive. It really was just 20 or so puppies wrestling around and running around a big football field. (Well, a small football field, but big to them.) It was really cute and fun. haha. A really simple idea. Who thought of it? Who pitched that idea to the Animal Planet big-whigs, and why did THEY also think it was a good idea? I don't really care either way 'cause I enjoyed it. haha.

Okay, that's kind of sad.

I'm gonna go.

totallybeelow @ 2005-02-06T00:18:00

2005-02-06T06:25:30Z

Today, I got up and Amanda and I went to eat at Thompson 'cause she wanted breakfast food. We saw some of The Boys there: Pablito, JPL, Slam, Garrett and Joe. Fun times.

Came back. I took a shower. Then we had a floor meeting. Everyone complains about it, but it really only takes 20 minutes. Not that big of a deal...

Immediately after that, Madeline and I went to Gumbart's where we bought T-Shirts so we can iron letters onto them. Then we went to Maurice's and decided not to spend money, which is probably a good thing 'cause I would have walked out of there with stuff I didn't need. Then we went to Capitol Records and I bought another Brian McKnight CD, bringing my total to 4. AND! The awesome part is that one of the songs on there is one that I had heard by him a couple years and burned onto a CD..but I haven't seen that CD for a while. And I LOVE the song!! Oh, man. Such a beautiful song. So that's exciting.
Then we went to Wal-Mart to buy little random stuff.

On the way back to Corbin from Wal-Mart, we got stuck by a train, which is bad 'cause I was already running late to get to my rehearsal with Karlene and Jenn. As I walked into Corbin, we saw Karlene in the lobby copying some music and I was like,"Uh...I'll be right down." A couple minutes later, I was downstairs in my shirt and tie and lookin' hot. So I copied some music, discussed it with Karlene and we headed over to COFAC, but it was locked. Took a while for OPS to come and open it, but they did and we rehearsed. Then Karlene started her recital and we played and did only mediocrely. I could have done much better, but oh well. At least I'll have more time now without rehearsals and stuff (because Brandon's recital was yesterday and I played on TWO things for him!!).

After I got done playing the trio with Karlene and Jenn, I rushed back to Corbin, picked up my package from behind the desk because I knew that it was my sweaters that I ordered the other day. I threw one of them on and rushed out the door with Kristin Fiebrant. We went to see "Shark Tale" in the union. It was just alright. Nothing too exciting. I think I laughed maybe twice or something. Whatever.

After the movie, I wasted some time in my room. Talked to Teresa on the phone. Then Amanda and I went to 309 and hung out there for a while in celebration of Ben Tague's birthday. I didn't want to stay too long, though, 'cause I have to work at the front desk at 1 AM. So we left semi-early. And I've been here ever since. A pretty eventful day. But that's okay. I'd rather it be eventful than boring.

totallybeelow @ 2005-02-05T05:05:00

2005-02-05T11:06:18Z

Wow, it's been so long. So obviously nothing TOO exciting is going on, right? haha. Well...

I won't bother with the little things that happen from day to day since I'm so far behind in the "updating" process. Here are the main big things:

I've come to another one of those standstills. I had another breakdown. I'm just so sick of seeing everyone around me happy while I sit here with not too much to be happy about. The worst is when I see people experiences stuff that I would kill for, yet they're not satisfied. What the hell?!

More specifically, I look around and people are either in relationships or have a lot of friends with benefits. I know, I know. It always comes down to this with me and I hate it, too. But everyone has that need to feel loved. I'm one of those people with that need, but it's not fulfilled. I see people going from relationship to relationship (or bed to bed in some situations), yet all they can do is complain about how they can't find "the perfect" person. Okay, first of all, the perfect person doesn't exist. Second, please TRY to be happy with what you have. At least you have opportunities upon opportunities.

I, on the other hand, have to struggle with trying to find someone acceptable out of only 10% of the population. And most of that 10% really annoy the shit out of me. So now we're down to about...what? 2%? And then from that 2%, only about 1% is actually "out," a term I hate to use but is understandable for everyone. Slim-pickin's, my friends. Slim pickin's.

And don't pull this "well, it was your choice" crap with me, because it wasn't. When you can flip through your diary (or your xanga, what have you) and point out to me that day in your life when you decided that you would be straight, then let's talk. Until then, I don't want to hear it.

And that's another issue: why am I constantly having to defend myself to people? I like men: I've dealt with it, now you can too. And you know what? It's something that I have to deal with everyday. Not so in your case, so chill the F out. And you know what else? It's not even your business!! If my sexual identity is something that I feel like I need/want to share with you, then I'll share it with you. If not, then it obviously doesn't concern you so stop passing all these judgments on me. There's more to me than who I sleep with and if you're blinded by that I just don't want to deal with you. I don't have time for people like you. I'd really appreciate it if judgments on homosexuality would cease. I can pass judgments on you too: You're closed-minded.

As if getting flack from "friends" isnt' enough, I get it from complete strangers. Or at least anonymous people. I've been getting phone calls every now and then from (I think drunken) people who won't share their names with me. Well, at least there's this one guy. He'll call me really early in the morning (thus waking me up) to tell me that he wants me and is in love with me and wants to "give you a boner." All this while his friends are laughing in the background. Alright, here's how this works: You're drunk and I'm smart. I notice little things that you say that keep pointing me more and more in the right direction of who you are. Not like I'm gonna kick ass over this or anything. It just sucks hearing some random person that you don't know poking fun at you on the phone with his friends laughing in the background. Maybe once I find out who he is, I'll make an anonymous phone call to him and make fun of him for having brown hair (assuming his hair is, in fact, brown). It's essentially the same thing.

And "friends." Part of my breakdown the other night was not only my lack of an emotional/romantic bond with someone, but also my lack of lasting friendships. Sure, I have a few tight friends. I think I could count them on one hand, though. Maybe only a fraction of a hand.

Then there's that guy whom I used to be extremely tight with. Extremely. I mean, wait. That's what I thought, anyway. I was oh-so-sadly mistaken. We lost communication quite abruptly shortly after our "awesome" friendship started. It's caused an actual change in my persona. No longer am I so outgoing with people. No longer am I so willing to meet new people, because who knows which of those people will continuously talk to me and which of them will just blow me off after a little while? I'd just rather not risk it. The good times we had were good, but not good enough to overshadow this one bad time.

And then there's this guy who...umm...this is gonna be tricky...I feel like is constantly pushing me away. Unless it's convenient for him. When it's convenient for him, I may get a hello. I may even get a conversation. I may even get some sex! But it's all so random. Which days will be the good days and which days won't be? I thought I was in love, I really did. I still think I was. I still think I am? No, I can't be. I've been hurt far too much by one guy to still love him. Yet I get jealous when I merely see him talking to other people.

So here's what I've done: I've decided to give up on the two above-mentioned guys. And I'm serious. I'm through with wasting my time on these guys. If something were to progress (whether it be platonically or romantically/platonically, respective to the guys mentioned) it would have happened by now. But nothing. I've gotten nothing. So I'm gonna give nothing. If you want to talk to me, if you want to continue to be friends, it's all up to you now. The ball is in your court. I've served it too many times to the other side of the net, only to find that there was no one there to return it.

Yet again I'm living that one cheesy scene in a cheesy movie where the cheesy main character is standing alone amongst a crowd of quick-moving people.

totallybeelow @ 2005-01-14T01:28:00

2005-01-14T07:39:13Z

Yesterday, Wednesday, I got up and helped Mom and Alyse clean the house becuase it was gonna be looked at buy possible buyers later. So when the time came around, we left the house and went to Walgreens to pick some stuff up. Liz (who works at Walgreens) and I couldn't figure out how to get the back off my watch off so I couldn't get a battery-change. Saddening. My mom dropped me off at the mall and I ran in and returned a shirt that I bought the day before. I exchanged it for one just like it. I got the wrong size. Whoops. Then we went to dinner at Applebee's. Mmm...Then on the way home, we stopped by Batteries Plus and I got the new watch battery. Turns out the watch is broken. It just doesn't turn the hands. It wasn't even the battery in the first place!! Oh well. Then I went to Wal-Mart real fast since it's right by Batteries Plus and I got a red T-Shirt and white iron-on letters. I wanted a yellow T-Shirt with black iron-ons so I could make a "huggable" shirt like Landon on The Real World has. But they didn't have the yellow I wanted so I got the red. I think it might even look cooler. I went home and tried to iron the letters on but it just did not work for me at all and I got pissed. Went to bed pissed. haha.

Woke up today and finished loading the car. Then my mom and I brought me back down to Macomb. And now I've been in Macomb since about 2ish. I thought that training started tomorrow, but it doesn't start for me until Saturday. So I'll be here all Friday with nothing other than bulletin boards to do. That's alright. I can get stuff done. So when I got back into town, I put stuff away, listened to music...Then I went to Madeline's for dinner. She made spaghetti. And then we watched some TV. Then I came back to my room, lounged around some more, listened to some more music, and now I need to go finish my door decs. So I'm going to. See y'all later.

totallybeelow @ 2005-01-12T02:21:00

2005-01-12T08:29:44Z

Today, I actually started working on door decs finally. Then Caitlin called me and we went to the mall. It was cool. I've never hung out with her before. We met each other years ago when I went to one rehearsal for Music Guild. And since Travis did Music Guild, he knew her and introduced me. But I only went to one rehearsal. But now she goes to Western and we're in Concert Band and Wind Ensemble together. And since she only lives in Moline, we decided to hang out. So we did. And it was fun. :)

Then I came home, got some dinner and lounged around the rest of the night. Well, lounging also included working on door decs. I'm almost done with the hard part (tracing the shapes and cutting them out). Now all I have to do is finish cutting out the rest of the black parts of the penguins, tape the white parts on, draw the faces and write residents' names and room numbers on them.

Check this out: "Two Guys and a Girl" was on TV tonight!! Oh, how I wish that we got the Women's Entertainment Channel (er...Women's Entertainment Center, as I called it earlier tonight...haha. Whoops) at school. DO we get it at school? If we do, I'm totally watching it every night. That used to be my favorite show ever!!

I e-mailed a good friend the other night and told him that I have a crush on him. It was well-received, but he doesn't feel the same way. Of course. He's not gay. And, I mean, I knew that. I wasn't really shocked or anything. Just sucks 'cause I always fall for the ones that I can't have. Damn myself!! Whatever.

I'm gonna go.

totallybeelow @ 2005-01-11T01:38:00

2005-01-11T07:48:57Z

So can anyone tell me why my fonts on this webpage are suddenly smaller? I don't recall doing anything to it. Hm. Interesting. It doesn't look bad, I'm just curious.

Okay, so Thursday Liz and I went to see "A Series of Unfortunate Events." It was different from the books. That's right: I've read the books. But I really only bought them because I saw a preview for the movie and saw that it looked kinda funny and Jim Carrey's in it. I like Jim Carrey. So I bought 4 of the books and I'm only halfway throught the third. The movie's good. Very enjoyable. The events are a bit mixed up from the books, but that's okay. The same general jist is there. Then we ate at Steak 'n Shake. Mmm...Then she came over and we watched "Troy" with Alyse.

I forgot what happened on Friday. Oh! My dad came back from out of town and we went out to eat as a family. After that: no idea.

Saturday...I think I went somewhere to buy something. Or something. I forget what though. No. I went out to lunch with Chris and Cher. Good times. I haven't seen Cher since the last time Chris and I met her at Panera. I think that was about a year or so ago. And that was only my second time seeing Chris this break. Saddening; quite saddening. Came home, helped my dad make some guacamole. Mmm...Wish you coulda tasted it. So good. And we ate it with flautas. Again...so good. After that, we chilled and watched some Trading Spaces to get some ideas for our new apartment (actually, it's a condo I found out tonight...). The new condo that we haven't even moved into yet, though my dad has been paying the rent for it since October. I'm sick of the talk...I want to get it done. If we're gonna go, let's go. Why delay it? No need.

Sunday, yesterday, we all kicked back and did nothing, I think. Yep, that's it.

Today, lounged around. Had dinner (Travis came over 'cause it's Monday.) Then my mom and Alyse and I went out. I got some jeans, a shirt, some things for school (ie, deodorant, shampoo, that kinda stuff) and the new Green Day CD. Very good. I'm listening to it now. Thoroughly enjoyable. Then we came home and watched "Secret Window" 'cause my mom just bought it. It was pretty good, I thought. Well, I thought it started off kinda slow and a bit predictable. But the end totally makes up for it. Good symbolism and just an overall creepy idea. I liked it. :)

That's about all I've been up to. Hooray for me!! :)

totallybeelow @ 2005-01-06T00:52:00

2005-01-06T07:00:06Z

So today was another day in which I didn't leave the house. Those seem to be growing more and more abundant as the break slowly winds down. But you know? I'm okay with that. I definitely need time to just kick back and relax since I get zero time to do that at school. Whatever.

I do need to start practicing more and start working on door decs. And maybe do some reading for one of my Spanish classes. See? I even bring work home for me over breaks! It sucks. Oh well. Such is the life.

Maybe I lied earlier when I said that I didn't leave the house. I did go outside at 8 PM to shovel the driveway. This driveway here at la casa de Lopez is quite large. And I'm old. So large + old = a sore Bryan Lopez. And I don't like it.

I'm about to go look for this website that I need. It'll let me register for this conference that I need to go to in March. At this conference, I'll be going to interview after interview for grad school. It's pretty intensive, I guess. A whole day (possibly two) of interviews!! Whew. Fun times. But I need to register before the 10th. So I need to find this website so I can do that.

So here I go. Wish me luck. :)

totallybeelow @ 2005-01-05T01:46:00

2005-01-05T08:01:00Z

So we went to Macomb. I dunno. I've had funner times. We watched "Napoleon Dynamite" (my second and, hopefully, last time seeing it) and "Bruce Almight." We also ate a lot of food and played some Phase 10. That's about it. We came home kind of early the next day, which was totally cool with me. Later that night, the family and I went to my grandma's house 'cause my Uncle Tim, Aunt Peggy and my cousin Mitch (and his girlfriend Brandi) were in town. They live in Missouri so we don't get to see them too much. It was cool. We didn't wanna stay too long, but we ended up staying for a while 'cause my dad and Alyse and Mitch and Brandi and I played cards. haha. It was fun.

The next day was....Sunday....and I don't remember what I did.

Monday...I, uh...also don't remember. (I'm bad at this; I'm sorry).

Today, I got up early (for me) and bought "Troy." Laugh all you want; I liked it. So, since I was up early, I actually took a nap today!! Mark it on your calendars, friends, 'cause that never happens. Then I woke up and, uh....yeah....Pretty much bummed around all day. But that's okay. Snowstorm outside: what else can one do?

Sorry about the delay, but there really is a lack of cool things going on in my life right now. But that's okay. 1.5 weeks left of break and then the drama will all start again when I get back to school.

Hooray.

totallybeelow @ 2004-12-31T01:17:00

2004-12-31T07:28:22Z

Yesterday, Alyse and I went out shopping, but I actually didn't buy anything. Wait. I take that back. I got two sweaters, a nice button-down with vertical stripes, and the Best of Mandy Moore CD. SHUTUP!! It's an awesome CD. And it's a 2-disc deal, whereas the second disc is full of live performances and all her videos. Now, c'mon. Who can pass that up?

And then we went out to eat with the fam, came back and watched two hours of "Lost" on TV. Then my dad had some episodes taped because he knows that I don't have much time to watch TV at school. So we sat and watched those. Well, one of those. Then my parents went to bed and Alyse and I watched the other 2. haha. 5 hours of "Lost." I'm a nerd. But Alyse had never seen it before. Now she's all into it, too. haha. Good times.

Then today, my mom, Alyse, and I went shopping. My mom needed nice clothes. So Alyse and I helped her pick 'em out. I also bought a new pair of jeans since I accidentally ripped the pair of corduroys that I was wearing yesterday. I was so pissed!!! And my mom also bought me a really cool pair of pants: I'm not sure if they're jean-material or not, but they may be. Also, they're kinda khaki-colored and they have white pinstripes. So cool.

Then we came home...chilled out for a bit. Later, I called Liz ('cause she had called earlier) and we talked for a while. She said that he still hadn't eaten dinner yet (this was at roughly 9:30 PM) so we went to Village Inn. And we basically had a 2-hour bitchfest there. We just expressed our frustrations with things and people in our lives. Fun times.

Then I came home. :):)

Tomorrow, Liz and I are going to Macomb to hang out at Matt's house for the new year. We'll see how that goes. :)

totallybeelow @ 2004-12-29T01:53:00

2004-12-29T07:59:21Z

The plan was that Liz was supposed to get off work at 4ish or 4:30ish and then she and Chad and I were gonna go hang out and do stuff. So I sat around until then.

Okay, my dad also wanted to go to the movies tonight with Travis and Alyse and me, but I was uninformed of this until today (after the plans with Liz and Chad were made). So then there was this big mess: waiting for Chad to get done playing basketball and call one of us back, deciding whether we wanted to go with Chad or go to the movies with my dad and Alyse (Travis couldn't go), deciding which movie to go to and at which time...then Chad finally called back after we had decided to go to the movies with my dad and Alyse. So then my dad and Alyse decided not to do anything, and Chad and Liz and I didn't know what we wanted to do. So we just ended up having a game night here at my house. Liz, Chad, Alyse, my dad and me. We played Phase 10. Then everyone except my dad went downstairs and we watched "Stuck on You." I want everyone to know that someday before I die, I WILL make out with Matt Damon. :) (And, for the record, he's much smarter than Team America made him out to be: he was one semester away from graduating from Harvard!!) So anyway. After the movie, we just chilled out and talked and stuff.

That's pretty much all I did today. I didn't even leave the house at all!! Does that make me lame? I don't think so. In fact, I think that it may even make me cooler than some because I still know how to party and have fun without leaving the house.

Maybe I AM lame........................

totallybeelow @ 2004-12-28T01:44:00

2004-12-28T07:50:38Z

I woke up at noon and Kristin and I went sweater shopping at 1. I bought a nice pair of gray jeans from the Gap and waited in line for a half-hour before I could buy them. I also got a green sweater and three pairs of socks from American Eagle. I'ma be lookin' hot, y'alls. (There were a lot of apostrophes in that sentence. That's okay.)

Then I came home, had dinner with the fam and watched TV with Alyse. Then I went to Kristin's house for ice cream and euchre night. We had a mini tournament which I THINK Kristin and I won, but we all kinda stopped paying attention towards the end, so who knows? Then Kyle (one of Kristin's brother's friends) taught me how to play Poker and it was kinda fun. We all talked about religious topics, which is cool.

Then I came home! Fun day, fun day. :):)

And just for the record, Bryan Lopez + Graham Crackers = 4ever

Oh!! And thank the being that you believe in (if you believe in one) for deep-sea crime-fighters. It's a thankless job.

totallybeelow @ 2004-12-27T01:40:00

2004-12-27T07:54:41Z

So all that stuff was Tuesday.

Wednesday - obviously nothing too important happened or I'd remember.

Thursday - I guess, the same as Wednesday.

Friday - Christmas Eve. We have this tradition of opening one present on Christmas Eve. The one I opened was another bottle of Kirra (my awesome cologne). So that's exciting. Then my dad and Alyse and I went to church. Oh, man. I haven't been there in so long. And the next time I go will probably be next Christmas Eve (and against my will again, probably). After that, we got some dinner, then went to my Tia Bea's house. Couple hundred Mexicans in one house = fun times. Santa Claus came but I told my dad beforehand not to put a present in the bag for me. The last two times that I sat on Santa's lap, he insulted me. So I quit. I think I was the only one in the house who didn't get a present from him. And I'm fine with that. My dad gave it to me anyway and I opened it. So it's okay. I miss Tia Nana being Santa. She played the best Santa ever.

Oh, and my cousin Jackie was a bitch to Alyse and Tika and me. Bitch.

After Tia Bea's house the immediate fam and I went to my Eta's house and opened presents there. I don't get insulted there, so it's okay.

Came home.

Christmas Day - Travis came over and he woke me up. We all opened presents and good times were had. The family, as a whole, got a lot of board games so we played those. My grandparents (Mom's parents) came over along with Tracy (Travis' girlfriend) and we had dinner. Turkey is good. Then we watched the DVD that I bought for Travis (Mystery Science Theater 3000) but it actually wasn't that good. I've never seen an episode that wasn't good, but this one was. Was not good. Then we played the game that I bought for my dad. haha. Travis and Tracy and I won. The Travis and Tracy left and.....I forgot what happened.

Today, my dad and Alyse and I went out and returned things and bought things. I got myself a new coat. Which is good. The coat I've been wearing (that bright yellow and gray one that you all know) is many years old. So I'm exciting for this new gray one that I bought. It's much tamer and nice. More neutral. More grown-up, yet with a young, fun side. :) Came home, went to Frank's for dinner, came home, watched "21 Grams." WAY good movie!!! I definitely recommend it. Then Alyse and I watched "2gether." haha. Remember that movie? Also a recommendation.

And so now here I am. And here I go.

Bye bye.

totallybeelow @ 2004-12-23T01:46:00

2004-12-23T07:52:25Z

I woke up. Um. I think I practiced, actually. Read a bit. Wrapped the presents that I have bought thus far. Um. Sat there. Travis came over for dinner.

After dinner, we broke up into two teams: my dad and Alyse were the blue barricudas and my mom and I were the green monkeys. The green monkeys went to Old Navy and my mom bought me a nice turtleneck and an awesome hat to match the coat that I was wanting to buy tonight. However, Southpark didn't have it. So I guess I'll have to go out to Northpark tomorrow. Or something.

Then we went to SuperTarget to see if I could find Shawn there again. (Shawn = that hot guy that works there...the one that Alyse thought was trying to holla at me.) He was there but I dunno if he saw me. I definitely saw him and his hotness though. Then we went to Best Buy. Long lines. Then we went to Southpark. No coat. But my mom did buy herself a lot of clothes, which is good 'cause she needed them. She never buys anything for herself, so they were well-deserved.

Then we came home. The blue barricudas beat us, but that's okay. They even had car problems!! My dad's car died. :( So then Alyse and I watched Friends. And some more Friends. And now here I am. haha. :)

And I'm bored. Maybe I'll actually sleep soon. Who knows?

I'm breezy! (<---- If you know what that's from, I heart you.)

totallybeelow @ 2004-12-22T01:13:00

2004-12-22T07:14:18Z

Yesterday, Kristin, Alyse, Brad and I went to the Coralridge Mall. I bought my mom her birthday present. A Build-a-Bear monkey, 'cause she likes monkeys. It's cute.

Then we came back home, had dinner, Alyse went tanning, then we went to Blockbuster and rented 2 movies and got some Whitey's. We went home and watched "I, Robot" and then "Dodgeball." Both pretty good.

Today, Liz and I wanted to go see "A Series of Unfortunate Events" but she couldn't get through to tell me to be ready by 2 (stupid dial-up; my mom was online) and we couldn't go to the 4:00 show because I had plans to go shopping with Travis, Alyse and Sandy at 5:30. So Liz and I just went to Super Target (really only just so I could see if this guy named Shawn was working there. I saw him there the other day and Alyse thought he was trying to holla at me, which means hit on me. I wouldn't mind it at all. He was mega cute. He wasn't there though.), and then to Maggie Moo's. Best ice cream ever. Then we went to Northpark. Walked around there for a while. Then as we were going to come back to IL and drop me off at home so that I could go back out shopping with my siblings, Liz's car didn't start. We had to call her dad to come get us.

So we went back into the mall and walked around a bit more until he got there. We went back outside, he fixed the car, and she started to drive me back to my house, but Travis just wanted me to wait at Barnes & Noble. Instead, Liz dropped me off at the Toys R Us in Davenport and I waited there for Travis and Alyse to pick me up. So they did and we met Sandy at Northpark. Sheesh! I was so sick of Northpark by the end of the day. I did, however, end up buying my dad's present and Liz's present. :)

Then we went to Best Buy, where I showed Travis something that I was thinking about buying for myself, but he told me to buy it for him, so I did. I didn't want to buy it in front of him 'cause I like giving people the element of surprise. I originally told him to give me options so I could go back out later and buy one of them, thus not letting him know which present I bought. But he was so adamant that I just bought his present with him there. Oh well. I'll still wrap it and make it perty.

He dropped Alyse and me back off at home, we got dinner (finally at 9:30 PM) and watched "Saved!" Good movie. Then I came here.

And here I am.

And here I go.

P.S.
I'm quite pissed because Mr. Ginsberg gave me a B in my clarinet lessons!! Okay, so I had a bad jury, but I rocked out the rest of the semester. Does that not count? Whatever. I still did pretty well. (insert disappointed face here)

totallybeelow @ 2004-12-20T00:27:00

2004-12-20T06:42:51Z

First of all, I need to apologize to Zachariah for not seeing that comment he left on here saying that we need to hang out. Since I have updated in 2983289 years, I missed it and I'm sorry. How come we don't hang out as much as we should? We should fix that. haha.

Anyway. The speeches went alright. Abby and I got an A and I dunno what I got on the other one. Kind of don't care. I'm just excited that it's over. The bitch, Kat and I got an 80% on our paper. 80%?! Should have been higher, but whatever. On the last day of classes, we had to do a poster presentation and present the information from our paper in front of Psych department teachers. Kat had another one that she was working on for another class, so Carmen (the bitch) and I decided to do the presentation for our paper. Well, that was the plan. She stood over by Kat and I did ALL of the answering of questions. I was the only one who presented. I was pissed. Whatever. The semester's over and I'm glad.

The semester's over!!! How crazy is that? I'm so excited.

Oh!! I found out just a few hours before he left that my good friend Craigory is not coming back next semester because he's joining the Marine corps!! What the hell?! I'm so pissed it's not even funny. I miss him already. :( We've talked online a few times and we exchanged contact info so that's awesome. But still. :( = me

What else? Umm..I really don't feel like recapping the past 3 weeks, so I'll just skip ahead to this weekend: I had to play in the band for graduation. It was kinda boring at times, but at least I got to hang out with Kari Gregg AND I got $50!! haha. After we were done with the last performance, we were free to go and as soon as all of my residents were gone, I was able to leave the building. Dan the Man's ride was supposed to get there at 3:30ish or 4ish. He called at about 3:30 and said that he'd be like....after 4, he said. So I told Dan the Man that I'd stay with him (since I couldn't leave before him anyway)...But we went down to the lobby and I guess I could have left around 4:30 or so, but I didn't want to leave Dan the Man in the building with only RAs left. He doesn't know them! So my dad and I stayed and hung out with him so he wasn't lonely. :)

Then I came home and my dad and Alyse and I went out to eat, then shopping. By the end of the night, I was extremely tired 'cause I'd been up since 6:30 AM.

Today, I woke up and showered and then Alyse and I went to my Eta's house. My dad was already there. We ate some lunch, and then later had some cake and ice cream 'cause my cousin Tony's birthday is the 21st. He's gonna be 13!!! Oh, wow. Unbelievable. Then we came back home, I bathed Natalie (my fish) and then took off for Kristin's house. We had a Christmas party. It was awesome being able to see my friends that I haven't seen in a while. Kristin, Chris, Ben, Tricia, Dan and others were there. I love those skids. :)

So after that, I came home and got online here. haha.

I just wanna say that I <3 Matt Davis muchos. He's an awesome guy and he needs to know it. :)

K, I'm out. Bye bye!!

totallybeelow @ 2004-12-02T23:25:00

2004-12-03T05:59:17Z

I e-mailed K.C. over break. The past couple of nights, I've really thought about calling him, just to say hi. I haven't though. I'm a scaredycat.

I can't believe that we're almost done with the first week back from break. It went by really fast. And I'm really stressed out. Next Wednesday, I have to give two speeches. One in each of my Spanish classes. One is about contemporary Spanish music and I'm working on it with Abby, so it's not TOTALLY me. But the other one is all by myself. It can be about whatever we've talked about in class. Anything. I think I'm just gonna do the cop-out thing like everyone else in my class and report on an author. I was going to do it on existentialism, but that's hard for people to understand in English...can you imagine hearing about it in Spanish? So whatever. And on top of those two speeches (I almost typed performances...haha) I have to finish up that paper with the bitches. I'm soooooo excited for that to be done.

We have our choir performances this weekend. One tomorrow, one Saturday. Next week, I have a Concert Band concert and then a Wind Ensemble concert the next night.

I'm so stressed out right now with the above-mentioned activities/assignments!!

I wish I had more to type right now. But, really, all this stuff is what I'm all about right now. So, yeah, it's boring right now.

I can't wait for this weekend, even though it's only gonna be me working on those speeches and papers. I'm just sick of going to classes and the like. So whatever.

I'm gonna go to sleep, I think.

G'night.

totallybeelow @ 2004-11-25T00:53:00

2004-11-25T07:22:33Z

Survey 1:
BASICS:
Name: Bryan
Birth date: May 3rd, 1983 (Golfo's old. haha. J/K)
Birthplace: Silvis, IL
Current Location: Travis's old bedroom, soon to be someone else's house, East Moline, IL
Eye Color: Dark Dark Brown
Hair Color: Dark Dark Brown
Righty or Lefty: Righty
Zodiac Sign: Taurus
Innie or Outtie: Innie
Your heritage: LOL. I like the "nerd," Golfo. I'm half Mexican, a quarter Belgian, and a quarter left over.
The shoes you wore today: My blue shoes from American Eagle that I also have in black. haha. Don't tell anyone.
Your weakness: In which context?
Your fears: Death
Your perfect pizza: the kind that doesn't have weird fungi nor mushrooms on it. Craigory can tell you how much I hate mushrooms.
One thing you'd like to achieve: Superstardom. J/K. Success. That's vague on purpose.
Your most overused phrase on aol\aim: It used to be LOL. But then I realized that I rarely actually LOLed. So I changed it to "haha." Now I think I overuse that. Or any one of the smileys.
Your thoughts first waking up: Probably nothing. I think my mind is a blank.
The first feature you notice in the opposite (or same) sex: Clothes and hair.
Your best physical features: My hair? My clothes? I don't know.
Your usual bedtime: 12 to 2am
Your greatest accomplishment: These are hard questions. I think getting the RA position and then doing a satisfactory job at it.
Your best memory: No idea. There are a lot of good ones.

DO YOU:
Smoke: No
Sing well: Only sometimes.
Take a shower everyday: Definitely.
Want to go to college: I did at one point.
Like high school: I did when I was there
Want to get married: Yes!!
Type with your fingers on the right keys: Yes. Mrs. Potter taught me well. Er, rather, yelled at Cher and me a lot for talking when we were too busy taking our typing tests to actually talk.
Believe in yourself: Depends on in what context again.
Get motion sickness: No.

IN THE PAST MONTH, DID / HAVE YOU:
Drank alcohol: Nope
Smoke(d): Nope
Done a drug:No
Made Out: No :(
Gone on a date: No.
Gone to the mall?: Yeah
Been on stage: I think our concerts were more than a month ago.
Been dumped: No.
Gone skating: Nope.
Made homemade cookies: No
Been in love: No
Gone skinny dipping: No
Dyed your hair: No
Stolen anything: No. Man, I'm boring.

HAVE YOU EVER:
Played a game that required removal of clothing?: Yeah, but I didnt' have to do it. Liz, however, walked up and down the bus in just her bra. haha.
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: never
Been caught "doing something": Nope. Never have been caught. The phone has run when I've had boys over, but I didnt' answer it.
Been called a tease: No
Gotten beaten up?: No
Shoplifted: No

Age you hope to be married: Whenever it's legal and I find someone worthy of it.
Numbers and Names of Children: No idea.
Describe your Dream Wedding: Beautiful
What age do you want to die: No idea.
What country would you most like to visit: Egypt? England? Mexico? No!! Australia!! :)
What country would you least like to visit: I dunno.
Current Mood: A bit sleepy. Is that a mood?
Current Taste: Nothing.
Current Hair: Since I already picked the gel out of it, it's spikey, but semi-soft.
Current Annoyance: this undershirt of mine. ugh.
Current Favorite band: Brian McKnight for right now.
Current Book: "Dont' Shoot the Dog!" for my class.
Current DVD In Player: I think the most recent is Finding Nemo
Current Worry: I really don't feel actually worried about anything right now. It's great.
Current Crush: haha. Oh, man................

Survey 2:

FIVE YEARS AGO, I..
1. Got my driver's license
2. Was a sophomore in high school.
3. Was not very cool.

FOUR YEARS AGO, I..
1. Had been driving for a year.
2. Was a junior in high school.
3. Had the lead in a school play

THREE YEARS AGO, I...
1. Graduated High School and began school at WIU
2. Met Madeline and Amanda
3. Was roommates with Elliott VanFleet. I miss that kid.

TWO YEARS AGO, I...
1. Met George and Golfo and Matt McDonald (I miss him)
2. Started my first year as an RA on Olson 5
3. Was still uncool but accepted it.

ONE YEAR AGO, I...
1. Started my second year as an RA, but my first year on Corbin 3
2. Was the Vice President of the bands
3. Felt like my life was purposeless, boring and no longer fun

YESTERDAY, I...
1. Slept in a bit.
2. Got my hair cut
3. Talked to Liz on the phone.

TODAY, I...
1. Slept in again.
2. Bought a new pair of jeans, an awesome T-Shirt that says "easy" on the front, and some new cologne.
3. Hung out with my mom and sister.

THREE SONGS I KNOW ALL THE WORDS TO ARE...
Any *N Sync song
Some Brian McKnight songs (Hey, I'm still learning)
Jingle Bells?

TOP THREE LOCATIONS I'D LIKE TO RUN AWAY TO ARE...
1. I don't really run away
2. A close friend's house
3. A forest? I don't know.

FIRST THREE PEOPLE I THOUGHT ABOUT THIS MORNING...
1. My sister
2. My mom
3. My dad

totallybeelow @ 2004-11-24T00:52:00

2004-11-24T06:53:07Z

I got a bit of homework done today whilst watching soap operas with my mom. haha. Pretty much sat around all day (again). That's cool with me, though. As I grow older, I'm becoming more and more of a homebody. It's okay for now, but it might be a hindrance later. We'll see.

My dad came home and made flautas for dinner. Mmm...Then Alyse (my sister) and I went to Target. I bought a new alarm clock. It's wee and folds up to be even wee-er.

Then I watched "Real World." I'm still waiting for my acceptance letter.

Um...That's about it. Here I go..